As I write, my kids are dancing around me like wild Indians...sorry, Native Americans. They request Garth in the evenings so they can dance. Actually they request Garf, but being the in-tune father that I am I understand that they mean they want to hear "Against the Grain" or "Callin' Baton Rouge." They also like the Newsboys' song "Shine." They hold up their hands like they are holding imaginary drum sticks and wait until the drum part starts, at which time they play their air drums with as much enthusiasm and vigor as John Bonham. He was usually on speed but they are just being kids.
As you can imagine, my life right now revolves around my kids. I'm not going to lie and say it's been easy, but it is alot of fun and at times it has definitely been funny. I cannot imagine life without them. So, for my first post here I am going to give you a little window into my life - the kinds of things I hear every day.
Soon after Emma started making sentences Melissa and I began writing down some of the funny (we think they are funny anyway) things that our kids say. They usually say something funny every day, but we record only the best of the best. So, without further ado here's what we have so far:
June of '06 - Melissa asked Emma "where does milk come from." With a look that said "I can't believe you don't know that at your age" she replied "from the refrigerator, Momma."
August '06 - Lance and Donna were visiting and we were eating dinner. Emma was potty training at the time so her little potty was in the dining room (possibly with some pee in it). Johnny walked by with a piece of bread in his hand that looked wet. Trying to catch him before he took a bite I said with a sense of urgency "Johnny, let me smell your bread!" In my life at the time it seemed so normal, but the Loopers about fell out of their seats laughing.
Emma - "friggin' Maggie" (Our dog's name was Maggie. She recently got eaten by coyotes.)
September '06 - We were all sitting at the dinner table talking about why God sent Jesus. Melissa and I started singing "Jesus Loves Me." I guess we were singing kind of loud because Emma said "kids, kids, hush!" I wonder where she has heard that before.
Sept. '06 - On the plane to Michigan Emma looked at me and said with a sassy voice "Dadda, I peed OK."
Oct. '06 - Jared (one of our friends here) was letting Emma ride the horsey (his knee). When he stopped and said "the horsey is tired" she promptly asked "well, then can I ride the cow."
Oct. '06 - Andrew (one of our other friends) was riding with us somewhere and Johnny was whining pretty bad. After several failed attempts to make him stop he asked Emma if she could make him stop. Emma, like she says it all the time, said "Donny, do you want a candy bar?" he stopped whining and said "yes." That was the last we heard of him the rest of the ride.
Well, I have several more, but I will make a new post with them sometime soon. As they get older Emma will probably not dominate the quotes so much. Johnny, Annie, and Anderson will be bigger players in years to come.
Donna and I just got back from vacation after a great bit of rest and relaxation. We hit New YorkCity first, where Donna's sister Salli lives with her husband Dan. Highlights from this leg include a five hour delay that put us in NYC at 4 a.m. This at first was a little annoying but we had the city pretty much to ourselves for a couple of hours.
We visited the American Museum of Natural History and laughed our way through Spamalot. We also ate our way through the rest of the weekend, spending roughly $134,834 on food.
Donna and I are leaving Friday for a much needed vacation. We're headed to the East Coast to visit her sister in NYC and my friend Jason in Baltimore. I've been to New York City one other time (with Jason, actually) and met the world's dumbest con artist.
There were vendors on every corner selling knock-offs of all things imaginable. Watches were popular and TAG Heuer imitations were particularly hot items.
One night we were walking down the street and this guy walked up to us to ask if we wanted a nice watch real cheap. Unwilling to take no for an answer, he proceeded to show us said watch. It could be mine, my new friend told me, for the low price of $300. That was roughly one-fifth retail according to him. Unfortunatley for him, I had seen about a million fake watches that day and could tell this was a fugazi.
Being the persistent swindler he was, this guy assures me it's the real deal. And he can prove it. He then produces a receipt from his jacket pocket that, he says, proves the watch's value. But, and this is where it gets good, he didn't ACTUALLY pay for it himself. You see, he says, he stole some dude's credit card and bought the watch with it. But he don't need a watch, so he's graciously willing to pass the savings on to me.
So, this guy wanted me to take his word on the authenticity of the watch by convincing me that he was a thief.
In today's professional sports landscape where steroids, federal indictments and corruption are standard operating procedure, Michael Irvin would be considered a model citizen. I love the Cowboys and have been a pretty steadfast Irvin apologist, but I can't help but think that he was a pioneer for the bad behavior of today's overpaid and overexposed athletes.
But this weekend is a time for remembering what happened on the field. So here is a little reminder of how amazing it was:
This clip perpetuates the age-old question: Who's better, Superman or Batman?
The other day I was looking for batteries and found the Nintendo Game Boy I got for Christmas...oh...about 17 years ago. Donna and I have been playing it pretty much non-stop all week. It's been a good distraction during the wettest summer on record.
I am happy to report that my Tetris skills are still sharp after all these years. Donna is still working on her game, but we are confident that through hours of practice, she'll get to where she needs to be.
